

They might be reading a book together every night in the big bed in the primary bedroom or taking a family walk around the neighborhood every Sunday morning before breakfast. Start the process slowly by beginning new traditions as a family. The previously eldest child probably felt like they had a little bit of power that’s now been taken away from them, while the former baby of the house might feel like they've lost the attention they once had. If there was a change-up in birth order-that is, one child who was previously the oldest is now stuck in the middle-acknowledge the resentment that could cause. It will take a while to get to that point. So don’t expect everyone to be one big happy family in the beginning. Next, remember that in some way, your kids may be more like strangers than siblings. If you have different disciplinary styles, you're also likely to encounter problems.Ĭonsequences and rewards need to be the same for all the children, no matter how it used to work before you two got married.

Nothing will work if one of you blames the other person’s child for causing the rift.

How to solve it: First, talk to your spouse so you’re on the same page about sibling rivalry. For a child who hasn’t had to share a parent in a long time, that adjustment period might be a little bit longer. When it’s step-siblings that they’re not entirely comfortable with yet, the problem can magnify. The issue: It’s hard enough for a child to compete with siblings in a nuclear family.
